Home » FATWARENESS MONTH, Fatcon #12: D’Oh!

FATWARENESS MONTH, Fatcon #12: D’Oh!

Category: News|Random   Posted by:   on November 11th, 2009

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The Tracey Ullman show is pretty great. Trust.

Four score and about a million years ago in T.V. time (That means in 1987. lol), there was a little show on the air called the Tracey Ullman Show It was a sketch comedy show featuring, yeah, you guessed it, a very-talented comedienne named Tracey Ullman. It also featured cast members Julie Kavner and Dan Castellaneta in various bits that were pretty freakin’ hilarious if you ask me. I am going to go as far as to say that the Tracey Ullman show was a more-sophisticated and better-written In Living Color. Yeah, I said it. It was better. That Tracey Ullman was a fuckin’ riot!

Now how is this relevant to the fatness? Well, on this show in 1987, they introduced a two-minute animated short featuring what they thought to be the average American family doing all sorts of mundane, yet funny, American things. The voices were done by Kavner and Castellaneta and the animated short was just meant to be a break in between the comedy bits which were, did I mention this before, freaking hilarious.

But the cartoon garnered a lot of fan following and a few seasons later, they spun it off into it’s own 30-minute production and it got its own timeslot. Not bad for cartoon. So who was this family? Oh, just a bunch of yellow cartoons named THE SIMPSONS, that’s all.

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The newer and more-sleek Simpsons, versus the originals, who were crudely drawn.

Now what does this have to do with the fatness, eh? Well, I just wanted to give you a quick background dive into the history of the longest-running animated show on T.V. and to give some insight into why #12 on our list is so amazing and a perfect fatcon for the masses who are, er, heavy in mass? Today’s fatcon represents the heart of what I like to call FatMerica and is a little bit of an everyman. Who is this fat wonder who plopped down at #12? Alls we can say is, D’oh!

#12: Homer Simpson

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Fatcon #12: The one and only, Homer Simpson

I could tell you, with all my little flourishes and literary tricks why Homer is the man, well rather, the fat man at #12 on our list, but I like facts. (Don’t you?) That’s why I am going to do something that we writers like to call, “Cut & Paste” which basically means I am going to borrow some words from someone else to solidify my standing and prove my point. In other words, I am going to steal from the encyclopedia. lol In this case, Wikipedia. So take it away, Wiki…

  • Homer embodies several American working-class stereotypes: he is crude, overweight, incompetent, clumsy, lazy and ignorant; however, he is also fiercely devoted to his family. Despite the suburban blue-collar routine of his life, he has had a number of remarkable experiences.

Yeah. What they said. lol

I happen to think that Homer Simpson is amazing because he is everything that is wrong with average, white

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Don't think big. Be BIG.

America and in essence, everything that is right. Overweight, donut-loving and quite dumb, he is the happiest sonofabitch around and is content being, well, simple and chubby. Who can argue with that. In a world where we are all running and dashing and leaping and bounding to be the streamlined, shiny, classy versions of ourselves, Homer Simpson reminds us that there is only one thing that should matter. He reminds us that there is only one fundamental that is important. No, it’s not money. No, it’s not fame and fortune. No, it’s not working everyday and breaking our backs. It’s BEER. Yes, beer. That kind of fat genius deserves a little applause, dontcha think?

There are countless of episodes that feature Homer’s brilliance, but I think that my favorite one, as obscure as it is, is the one where Homer becomes a missionary and there is a moment in the episode where he is on the phone with Marge, his wife, and he is licking poisonous toads and trippin’, man. Yup, Homer…hallucinating. When asked if he is licking poisonous toads again, his response is, “I’m not not licking poisonous toads.”

lol

You have to love a man who has a way with words.

Oh, Homer. If only you were in charge. There would be Duff beer for everyone and sprinkle donuts with pink icing for all. I doubt we would be in a recession…but I am pretty sure we would all be obese and bald. lol

Here’s to you, fatcon #12, in all your beer-bellied, ignoramus glory. You are every man and no man, all at once and that’s why Homer, oh Homer, you are our hero.

-goobs


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